8 Jun

Fat People in Skinny Jeans



So I need to rant here a little.  What is it with all these skinny jeans and who the hell said it was supposed to be fashionable?

How can Euro trash be a fad or fashion?  How comfortable can your gonads be all wadded up in your pants?  Don’t you know that can make you sterile?

I’ll give some guys the benefit of the doubt.  Small petite guys who have some flare can obviously pull this off better than the awkward twinkie eating fat kid who has yet to figure out he’s better at wearing baggy clothes and playing video games .

The little scrawny skater kids who try and be like Vans rider Geoff Rowley are better suited for this kind of “fashion” so to speak.  So for some it can actually work.  But for those who are just trying to “fit in” or “be cool” because skinny jeans are all the rage, let me give you some advice.  BUY YOURSELF SOME REGULAR FIT JEANS!

I think skinny jeans just look plain odd.  Guys appear way more odd looking than the girls wearing these things.  In fact, most guys that wears these kind of jeans actually sort of look like girls to me.

Are skinny jean comfortable?  Well…for a girl they could be more tolerable but for a boy or man or kid or whatever with family jewels these could be detrimental to their health!  In no way shape or form is anyone with testicles supposed to bind them up in that manner.  They will become sterile!

As for the females wearing skinny jeans….well i guess if you’ve got it flaunt it.  Petite girls and women who can fit into a nice pair of skinny jeans should go for it.  That’s the fashion trend and if the shoe fits…or errr…if the jeans fit…wear em!

But buyer beware!!  The last thing people want to see is you muffin top hanging over your waistline.  Tuck that muffin inside some regular pants and cover with a shirt to avoid any added or unwanted attention.

Of course if you’re ok with your muffin top showing to the world then by all means paint yourself into those skinny jeans.

Another thing girls have to be careful of is showing camel toe when they wear skinny jeans.  Camel toe is just a little too revealing and really….i’m not sure anyone finds that attribute to be attractive on ANYONE.  Maybe I’m wrong here…correct me please if I am.

The ugly cousin of camel toe is the forbidden moose knuckle.  We’ve all seen it but not all of us knew how to define it.  It’s one of those things you see….and can’t stop looking at.  That image is forever embedded into your brain.

So take my advice or not.  The current fashion trend doesn’t mean that EVERYONE must abide and participate.  Not all bodies are alike and what is flattering to one may be faltering to another.

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